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Q: What do you get when you randomly pair Family Circus cartoons with captions from the pen of Friedrich Nietzsche?
A: Hilarity.
The site would be much better if it were cleaner without all of the ads cluttering it up, but it's a brilliant idea even if the execution is, in my opinion, flawed in its presentation.
Thanks to the Professor from Gonzo Science for pointing this out to me.
I found this on-line comic. It comes in an e-book format, but I couldn't get the plug-in to work, so I found it here as well with commentaries from different religious perspectives including Christian, Muslim, Atheist, Humanist, Taoist, Wiccan, and so on.
My friend Maria is making birdhouses now (for decorative use only) and since I haven't plugged her artsy craftiness (or is that craftsy artiness?) in awhile, I will now!
And that also allows me to segue into one of my favoritest songs ever which I used to sing as a lullaby to my kids, but not with the Doc Severinsen Orchestra backing me up...
I had almost forgotten about this shoot when I came upon this video. It was about 4 or 5 years ago. This was for a local band, the Black Eyed Snakes, and it was filmed in the NorShor Theater in Duluth, Minnesota. I was supposed to be a disinterested professorial type and one of the wrestlers slammed into my table, destroying it, while I calmly took a drink of my wine. We did that shot with the breakaway table 3 or 4 times, but it didn't make it into the video. Ah well.
Check out these digs. This family made their own low environmental impact home in Wales out of natural materials. They went from breaking ground to moving in over a period of 4 months and the main tools used were a "chainsaw, hammer and 1 inch chisel." They estimate it took about 1500 man hours and £3000.
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From their website...
Some key points of the design and construction:
I was watching a Doctor Who episode entitled Bad Wolf tonight and I loved this exchange:
Dalek: We have your associate. You will obey or she will be exterminated.The Doctor: No.
Dalek: Explain yourself.
The Doctor: I said "No."
Dalek: What is the meaning of this negative?
The Doctor: It means "No."
Dalek: But she will be destroyed.
The Doctor: No, because this is what I'm going to do, I'm going to rescue her. I'm going to save Rose Tyler from the middle of the Dalek fleet, and then I'm going to save the Earth, and then, just to finish off, I'm going to wipe every last stinking Dalek out of the sky.
Dalek: But you have no weapons, no defenses, no plan.
The Doctor: Yeah, and doesn't that scare you to death?
This is more than just bravado. This sums up for me the essential spirituality of Doctor Who - Resistance Is NOT Futile. In the face of false dichotomies and overwhelming odds there are always choices, and accepting the ones offered to you is often just plain stupid. Life is seldom "either or."
Further, the powers that be will always threaten to take away the things you love if you fail to obey. Don't believe them. They can't take what they can't comprehend.
This is in response to a discussion that developed in Pop Culture Update.
Three of my favorite comic books are probably not well known to the average person on the street. Usagi Yojimbo, Akiko, and Bone are, in my opinion, three of the smartest written comics on the market that are appropriate for younger and older readers alike.
All three of these comics are probably set apart, first, in that they were all originally printed in black and white, though they have gone over to color makeovers of some of their original work.
Usagi Yojimbo is set in feudal Japan and is populated by anthropomorphized animals. This fact, oddly, is never refered to in the comic, though Usagi is often called a "long eared ronin." In spite of this, the comic, while appropriate for kids, is far from childish. I learned a lot about feudal Japan by reading the stories, and the stories are extremely engaging and beautifully rendered.
Akiko is an innocent and rolicking story of a 4th grader who, one evening, has a spaceship pull up to her apartment window and whisk her away to all sorts of surreal adventures in an outer space that challenges every assumption we might have. Like Alice down the rabbit hole, she has her wits to face her formiddable opponents, and like Dorothy, she has a gang of mismatched friends, but that's more than sufficient and certainly entertaining.
Bone is about a little white creature called Fone Bone who stumbles into all sorts of trouble with his cousins, Phoncible P. and Smiley Bone, when they find themselves lost. They encounter danger, romance, friendship, and stupid, stupid rat creatures. The storyline, which is light and silly at first, gets increasingly darker as their friend and heroine Thorn's destiny is revealed.
Here is a wonderful album of art from Bone.
And these comics have lasting value. My children and I still read them years after the first read through and they have all become intrinsic to our vocabulary and family mythos.
Oh, how the culture wars have made us stupid. Honestly, part of the problem with this entire debate about what we can teach in school, be it evolution or sex ed, is a new set of values introduced not by the right, but by the left... that being the expectation not to be offended. The left in our society has been preaching tolerance and acceptance of all sorts of different points of view so that, now, the right can use this tolerance to hamstring our educational system to the point of absurdity.
At least we can still laugh about it. I found the above cartoon on Big Fat Whale and the below annotated periodic table on Braving the Elements.
Here's a ribbon to put on the back of your car. I found it on freewayblogger where you can download a pdf version if you prefer.
So the kids and I went to our first Huskies game of the summer in historic Wade Stadium. One of the things I love about going to a ball game is their quirky little song snippets they play throughout the game to egg on the opposition and fire up the crowd. All of the Huskies have their own personal theme song that plays as they step up to plate. I imagine them sitting around trying to figure out what their song will be for the season.
Now, I'm never going to be a ball player, but it still would be cool for my own personal sound cue to follow me around and psych me up. I think, for fun and irony, mine would have to be "Missionary Man" by the Eurythmics.
What would yours be?
Fuzzy tagged me for this post. I quote:
The purpose of this meme is to get people talking about their passion in life. It’s called the 5/5 meme. Five questions, then pass it to five people. "Expertise" could be your profession, hobby, or area of intense interest.Name your area of expertise/interest: Well, I considered lots of things that I do and enjoy - roleplaying, improv, writing, on-line gaming - but I decided to tackle the one that defines me to most people most of the time - preaching.
How did you become interested in it?
I think I've always been fascinated by preachers and preaching. There's showmanship and scholarship, ritual and tomfoolery. As a preacher you can be both the sage and the village idiot at the same time. Shaman, priests, monks, and holy people of all stripes have always been of interest to me.
How did you learn to do it?
The short answer is, by doing it. The long answer is, by doing it for a long time. I was just adding up the number of sermons I have probably preached over my lifetime and, including Sunday mornings, funerals, weddings, and other special occasions, it must be getting close to 1000. That said, I'd say that the biggest aid in preaching was my background in improv. Improv taught me to think on my feet. It taught me that the best instinct is the honest instinct. It taught me not to act but to engage and to listen more than I talk. All of which are useful skills in preaching. I preach without notes and, as such, I am engaged body and spirit with the congregation, not with my notes or manuscript.
Who has been your biggest influence?
Fr. Peter Bunder of Good Shepherd Episcopal Church in West Lafayette is, without a doubt, my single greatest influence in my homiletical style. He is honest, scholarly, folksy, genuine, funny, well read, and totally engaged. He isn't afraid to not know something and is delighted when he does! And you are delighted right along with him. You enjoy his preaching because he enjoys it so much.
What would you teach people about it?
Always preach to yourself first. If what you are preaching doesn't speak to your personal condition, then it probably won't speak to other people. Preaching is first a conversation and as such, it needs to be honest.
Well, now that I've done that, I get to tag five more people. I tag Scotto, Michelle, Simon, Emma, and Maria.
If I didn't tag you, feel free to do it anyway either on your own blog or here in the comments.
I had a good night of very vivid dreams last night and what's more I remembered most of them in the morning. In fact while I was waking up I was still in that delicious semi-dream state where everything takes on a sheen of awe and wonder.
One of the most provocative of my nocturnal narratives was a tale of two people who were infatuated with each other but were too shy to let the other know because, unbeknownst to each other, they were both secretly cyborgs. He had lost his original legs and arms and she had lost her original arms and most of her face. Both were afraid of the rejection they'd face if the other found out that he or she wasn't completely human. In the dream I was a friend to each of them and knew their secrets, but couldn't convince either of them to overcome their shyness.
Had any great dreams lately?
I got a Netflix account a few weeks ago and I've been using it to catch up on pop culture I've missed over the last few years. Presently I'm watching the first seasons of "Lost," "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," and the revamped "Doctor Who." I haven't really watched television in about 10 years, so I have a lot of catching up to do.
People I love keep talking about Buffy in rapturous tones and it was made by Joss Whedon of "Firefly" fame, so I needed to give that a shot. Yes, I know most people know him the other way around, but I always was contrary. Buffy is great so far. Smart writing and fun characters. I'm loving it.
"Lost" was also a show that seems to be widely loved by people, so I'm trying that out. So far it feels like "Northern Exposure" meets "The Prisoner" and I'm liking it all right. There are some very smartly written characters.
My kids and I are especially enjoying "Doctor Who" which they have never seen before in any incarnation, but it has become part of their lore about their mother and me and our college friends.
"So you guys used to stay up until midnight on Sundays to watch this?""Yep, on WTTW. Though it wasn't as cool as this. The effects were bad. The writing was often ludicrous. And the sets looked like they were about to fall down. We loved every minute of it. And we'd get liter pops from Brad's Bagels and sometimes a Warm 'n' Sticky."
"A 'Warm 'n' Sticky?'"
"Yep, that's a cream cheese brownie with ice cream, hot fudge, and whipped cream. That makes just about anything bearable."
Ah yes, those were the days.
So, that's what's on my summer pop culture watch list. What are you watching?
I made this poster for my friend BadCat! who dropped this gem into a conversation on another blog. I don't think it originated with her, but it made me laugh.
Since the site is in Russian I'm not sure on the details of the exhibit, but the pictures speak for themselves.
In a National Security and Homeland Security Presidential Directive signed on May 9, 2007 the President grants himself blanket powers in case of an emergency. The whole document can be found at the White House website and is appended below. Thanks to Christof for alerting me to this.
Can we call it fascism yet?
National Security and Homeland Security Presidential DirectiveNATIONAL SECURITY PRESIDENTIAL DIRECTIVE/NSPD 51
HOMELAND SECURITY PRESIDENTIAL DIRECTIVE/HSPD-20
Subject: National Continuity Policy
Purpose
(1) This directive establishes a comprehensive national policy on the continuity of Federal Government structures and operations and a single National Continuity Coordinator responsible for coordinating the development and implementation of Federal continuity policies. This policy establishes "National Essential Functions," prescribes continuity requirements for all executive departments and agencies, and provides guidance for State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector organizations in order to ensure a comprehensive and integrated national continuity program that will enhance the credibility of our national security posture and enable a more rapid and effective response to and recovery from a national emergency.
Definitions
(2) In this directive:
(a) "Category" refers to the categories of executive departments and agencies listed in Annex A to this directive;
(b) "Catastrophic Emergency" means any incident, regardless of location, that results in extraordinary levels of mass casualties, damage, or disruption severely affecting the U.S. population, infrastructure, environment, economy, or government functions;
(c) "Continuity of Government," or "COG," means a coordinated effort within the Federal Government's executive branch to ensure that National Essential Functions continue to be performed during a Catastrophic Emergency;
(d) "Continuity of Operations," or "COOP," means an effort within individual executive departments and agencies to ensure that Primary Mission-Essential Functions continue to be performed during a wide range of emergencies, including localized acts of nature, accidents, and technological or attack-related emergencies;
(e) "Enduring Constitutional Government," or "ECG," means a cooperative effort among the executive, legislative, and judicial branches of the Federal Government, coordinated by the President, as a matter of comity with respect to the legislative and judicial branches and with proper respect for the constitutional separation of powers among the branches, to preserve the constitutional framework under which the Nation is governed and the capability of all three branches of government to execute constitutional responsibilities and provide for orderly succession, appropriate transition of leadership, and interoperability and support of the National Essential Functions during a catastrophic emergency;
(f) "Executive Departments and Agencies" means the executive departments enumerated in 5 U.S.C. 101, independent establishments as defined by 5 U.S.C. 104(1), Government corporations as defined by 5 U.S.C. 103(1), and the United States Postal Service;
(g) "Government Functions" means the collective functions of the heads of executive departments and agencies as defined by statute, regulation, presidential direction, or other legal authority, and the functions of the legislative and judicial branches;
(h) "National Essential Functions," or "NEFs," means that subset of Government Functions that are necessary to lead and sustain the Nation during a catastrophic emergency and that, therefore, must be supported through COOP and COG capabilities; and
(i) "Primary Mission Essential Functions," or "PMEFs," means those Government Functions that must be performed in order to support or implement the performance of NEFs before, during, and in the aftermath of an emergency.
Policy
(3) It is the policy of the United States to maintain a comprehensive and effective continuity capability composed of Continuity of Operations and Continuity of Government programs in order to ensure the preservation of our form of government under the Constitution and the continuing performance of National Essential Functions under all conditions.
Implementation Actions
(4) Continuity requirements shall be incorporated into daily operations of all executive departments and agencies. As a result of the asymmetric threat environment, adequate warning of potential emergencies that could pose a significant risk to the homeland might not be available, and therefore all continuity planning shall be based on the assumption that no such warning will be received. Emphasis will be placed upon geographic dispersion of leadership, staff, and infrastructure in order to increase survivability and maintain uninterrupted Government Functions. Risk management principles shall be applied to ensure that appropriate operational readiness decisions are based on the probability of an attack or other incident and its consequences.
(5) The following NEFs are the foundation for all continuity programs and capabilities and represent the overarching responsibilities of the Federal Government to lead and sustain the Nation during a crisis, and therefore sustaining the following NEFs shall be the primary focus of
the Federal Government leadership during and in the aftermath of an emergency that adversely affects the performance of Government Functions:
(a) Ensuring the continued functioning of our form of government under the Constitution, including the functioning of the three separate branches of government;
(b) Providing leadership visible to the Nation and the world and maintaining the trust and confidence of the American people;
(c) Defending the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, and preventing or interdicting attacks against the United States or its people, property, or interests;
(d) Maintaining and fostering effective relationships with foreign nations;
(e) Protecting against threats to the homeland and bringing to justice perpetrators of crimes or attacks against the United States or its people, property, or interests;
(f) Providing rapid and effective response to and recovery from the domestic consequences of an attack or other incident;
(g) Protecting and stabilizing the Nation's economy and ensuring public confidence in its financial systems; and
(h) Providing for critical Federal Government services that address the national health, safety, and welfare needs of the United States.
(6) The President shall lead the activities of the Federal Government for ensuring constitutional government. In order to advise and assist the President in that function, the Assistant to the President for Homeland Security and Counterterrorism (APHS/CT) is hereby designated as the National Continuity Coordinator. The National Continuity Coordinator, in coordination with the Assistant to the President for National
Security Affairs (APNSA), without exercising directive authority, shall coordinate the development and implementation of continuity policy for executive departments and agencies. The Continuity Policy Coordination Committee (CPCC), chaired by a Senior Director from the Homeland Security Council staff, designated by the National Continuity Coordinator, shall be the main day-to-day forum for such policy coordination.
(7) For continuity purposes, each executive department and agency is assigned to a category in accordance with the nature and characteristics of its national security roles and
responsibilities in support of the Federal Government's ability to sustain the NEFs. The Secretary of Homeland Security shall serve as the President's lead agent for coordinating overall
continuity operations and activities of executive departments and agencies, and in such role shall perform the responsibilities set forth for the Secretary in sections 10 and 16 of this directive.
(8) The National Continuity Coordinator, in consultation with the heads of appropriate executive departments and agencies, will lead the development of a National Continuity Implementation Plan (Plan), which shall include prioritized goals and objectives, a concept of operations, performance metrics by which to measure continuity readiness, procedures for continuity and incident management activities, and clear direction to executive department and agency continuity coordinators, as well as guidance to promote interoperability of Federal Government continuity programs and procedures with State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector owners and operators of critical infrastructure, as appropriate. The Plan shall be submitted to the President for approval not later than 90 days after the date of this directive.
(9) Recognizing that each branch of the Federal Government is responsible for its own continuity programs, an official designated by the Chief of Staff to the President shall ensure that the executive branch's COOP and COG policies in support of ECG efforts are appropriately coordinated with those of
the legislative and judicial branches in order to ensure interoperability and allocate national assets efficiently to maintain a functioning Federal Government.
(10) Federal Government COOP, COG, and ECG plans and operations shall be appropriately integrated with the emergency plans and capabilities of State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector owners and operators of critical infrastructure, as appropriate, in order to promote interoperability and to prevent redundancies and conflicting lines of authority. The Secretary of Homeland Security shall coordinate the integration of Federal continuity plans and operations with State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector owners and operators of critical infrastructure, as appropriate, in order to provide for the delivery of essential services during an emergency.
(11) Continuity requirements for the Executive Office of the President (EOP) and executive departments and agencies shall include the following:
(a) The continuation of the performance of PMEFs during any emergency must be for a period up to 30 days or until normal operations can be resumed, and the capability to be fully operational at alternate sites as soon as possible after the occurrence of an emergency, but not later than 12 hours after COOP activation;
(b) Succession orders and pre-planned devolution of authorities that ensure the emergency delegation of authority must be planned and documented in advance in accordance with applicable law;
(c) Vital resources, facilities, and records must be safeguarded, and official access to them must be provided;
(d) Provision must be made for the acquisition of the resources necessary for continuity operations on an emergency basis;
(e) Provision must be made for the availability and redundancy of critical communications capabilities at alternate sites in order to support connectivity between
and among key government leadership, internal elements, other executive departments and agencies, critical partners, and the public;
(f) Provision must be made for reconstitution capabilities that allow for recovery from a catastrophic emergency and resumption of normal operations; and
(g) Provision must be made for the identification, training, and preparedness of personnel capable of relocating to alternate facilities to support the continuation of the performance of PMEFs.
(12) In order to provide a coordinated response to escalating threat levels or actual emergencies, the Continuity of Government Readiness Conditions (COGCON) system establishes executive branch continuity program readiness levels, focusing
on possible threats to the National Capital Region. The President will determine and issue the COGCON Level. Executive departments and agencies shall comply with the requirements and
assigned responsibilities under the COGCON program. During COOP activation, executive departments and agencies shall report their readiness status to the Secretary of Homeland Security or the Secretary's designee.
(13) The Director of the Office of Management and Budget shall:
(a) Conduct an annual assessment of executive department and agency continuity funding requests and performance data that are submitted by executive departments and agencies as part of the annual budget request process, in order to monitor progress in the implementation of the Plan and the execution of continuity budgets;
(b) In coordination with the National Continuity Coordinator, issue annual continuity planning guidance for the development of continuity budget requests; and
(c) Ensure that heads of executive departments and agencies prioritize budget resources for continuity capabilities, consistent with this directive.
(14) The Director of the Office of Science and Technology Policy shall:
(a) Define and issue minimum requirements for continuity communications for executive departments and agencies, in consultation with the APHS/CT, the APNSA, the Director of the Office of Management and Budget, and the Chief of Staff to the President;
(b) Establish requirements for, and monitor the development, implementation, and maintenance of, a comprehensive communications architecture to integrate continuity components, in consultation with the APHS/CT, the APNSA, the Director of the Office of Management and Budget, and the Chief of Staff to the President; and
(c) Review quarterly and annual assessments of continuity communications capabilities, as prepared pursuant to section 16(d) of this directive or otherwise, and report the results and recommended remedial actions to the National Continuity Coordinator.
(15) An official designated by the Chief of Staff to the President shall:
(a) Advise the President, the Chief of Staff to the President, the APHS/CT, and the APNSA on COGCON operational execution options; and
(b) Consult with the Secretary of Homeland Security in order to ensure synchronization and integration of continuity activities among the four categories of executive departments and agencies.
(16) The Secretary of Homeland Security shall:
(a) Coordinate the implementation, execution, and assessment of continuity operations and activities;
(b) Develop and promulgate Federal Continuity Directives in order to establish continuity planning requirements for executive departments and agencies;
(c) Conduct biennial assessments of individual department and agency continuity capabilities as prescribed by the Plan and report the results to the President through the APHS/CT;
(d) Conduct quarterly and annual assessments of continuity communications capabilities in consultation with an official designated by the Chief of Staff to the President;
(e) Develop, lead, and conduct a Federal continuity training and exercise program, which shall be incorporated into the National Exercise Program developed pursuant to Homeland Security Presidential Directive-8 of December 17, 2003 ("National Preparedness"), in consultation with an
official designated by the Chief of Staff to the President;
(f) Develop and promulgate continuity planning guidance to State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector critical infrastructure owners and operators;
(g) Make available continuity planning and exercise funding, in the form of grants as provided by law, to State, local, territorial, and tribal governments, and private sector critical infrastructure owners and operators; and
(h) As Executive Agent of the National Communications System, develop, implement, and maintain a comprehensive continuity communications architecture.
(17) The Director of National Intelligence, in coordination with the Attorney General and the Secretary of Homeland Security, shall produce a biennial assessment of the foreign and domestic threats to the Nation's continuity of government.
(18) The Secretary of Defense, in coordination with the Secretary of Homeland Security, shall provide secure, integrated, Continuity of Government communications to the President, the Vice President, and, at a minimum, Category I executive departments and agencies.
(19) Heads of executive departments and agencies shall execute their respective department or agency COOP plans in response to a localized emergency and shall:
(a) Appoint a senior accountable official, at the Assistant Secretary level, as the Continuity Coordinator for the department or agency;
(b) Identify and submit to the National Continuity Coordinator the list of PMEFs for the department or agency and develop continuity plans in support of the NEFs and the continuation of essential functions under all conditions;
(c) Plan, program, and budget for continuity capabilities consistent with this directive;
(d) Plan, conduct, and support annual tests and training, in consultation with the Secretary of Homeland Security, in order to evaluate program readiness and ensure adequacy and viability of continuity plans and communications systems; and
(e) Support other continuity requirements, as assigned by category, in accordance with the nature and characteristics of its national security roles and responsibilities
General Provisions
(20) This directive shall be implemented in a manner that is consistent with, and facilitates effective implementation of, provisions of the Constitution concerning succession to the Presidency or the exercise of its powers, and the Presidential Succession Act of 1947 (3 U.S.C. 19), with consultation of the Vice President and, as appropriate, others involved. Heads of executive departments and agencies shall ensure that appropriate
support is available to the Vice President and others involved as necessary to be prepared at all times to implement those provisions.
(21) This directive:
(a) Shall be implemented consistent with applicable law and the authorities of agencies, or heads of agencies, vested by law, and subject to the availability of appropriations;
(b) Shall not be construed to impair or otherwise affect (i) the functions of the Director of the Office of Management and Budget relating to budget, administrative, and legislative proposals, or (ii) the authority of the Secretary of Defense over the Department of Defense, including the chain of command for military forces from the President, to the Secretary of Defense, to the commander of military forces, or military command and control procedures; and
(c) Is not intended to, and does not, create any rights or benefits, substantive or procedural, enforceable at law or in equity by a party against the United States, its
agencies, instrumentalities, or entities, its officers, employees, or agents, or any other person.
(22) Revocation. Presidential Decision Directive 67 of October 21, 1998 ("Enduring Constitutional Government and Continuity of Government Operations"), including all Annexes thereto, is hereby revoked.
(23) Annex A and the classified Continuity Annexes, attached hereto, are hereby incorporated into and made a part of this directive.
(24) Security. This directive and the information contained herein shall be protected from unauthorized disclosure, provided that, except for Annex A, the Annexes attached to this directive are classified and shall be accorded appropriate handling, consistent with applicable Executive Orders.
GEORGE W. BUSH
My Little Golden Book about ZOGG is a parody of an insipid children's book about God that I actually remember from my childhood.
As I remember it, it was pretty creepy then. The rewrite is even creepier.
Prepare yourself for the "powder scented Final Solution of our enemies from beyond..."
Here is a visual index of Out of the Hat scripts I've posted on this site. Enjoy!
Free Spirit Spheres are free-hanging spherical habitats custom-made in British Columbia. Go visit the site just to see the fantastic photos. It's RV living meets Jacques Cousteau submersible meets Wookiee tree dwelling.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... the Vienna Vegetable Orchestra!
This video is very helpful in visualizing dimensions from 1 to 10. This is from the website tenthdimension.com which has more related material. Part Two is below.
Well, here's my second Out of the Hat installment for the weekend. My prompts for tonight were:
Who: The traveling TB patient
What: copier machine
Where: in a UPS truck
I sort of cheated in that my Who became my What and my What became my Where and my Where became my Who... but who cares?
I really like this script not because it's brilliant, but because it's brilliantly simple. It is definitely an actor's script. It should be easy to learn and quick to put up on its feet and good actors should have a ball with it.
Anybody who has done improv will recognize immediately that this is based on an old short form game called "emo replay" where you do a simple scene over several times with different emotional overlays. This is really no more than a scripted form of that.
What Just Happened
written for Out of the Hat 9
Renegade Comedy Theatre
Duluth, Minnesota
CAST:
FELICITY – manager
MARSHA – temp worker
GREG – UPS driver
SCENE 1
LIGHTS UP
MARSHA (enters room, papers in hand, starts to use copier) It’s not working! (messes with copier)
FELICITY (enters) Hello, Marsha.
MARSHA Hello, Ms. Walker.
FELICITY Please, call me Felicity. Problems?
MARSHA I can’t seem to get this copier to work. It seems broken.
FELICITY Let me see if I can make it work.
MARSHA Thanks. I’ve never been good with machines. They kind of scare me.
FELICITY You just have to show them who’s boss. Ah, here’s your problem. You’re out of toner.
MARSHA Toner?
FELICITY The ink. It’s out. (starts to look around) Well, help me find some. There should be some around here somewhere.
MARSHA What am I looking for?
FELICITY A box marked “toner.” There should be some around her somewhere. (searches for a bit) And it’s not that scary.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY Machines aren’t that scary. They are predictable. It’s people who are scary. Especially people like that guy who traveled all over the world with an untreatable case of tuberculosis. That’s scary.
MARSHA Yeah, I suppose so.
GREG (enters and coughs to alert the two to his presence) Excuse me, ladies. I’ve got a UPS delivery here.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY What do you have for us… (looks at nametag) Greg?
GREG (looks at box) Errr… toner.
MARSHA My hero!
FELICITY That’s exactly what we need. You showed up in the nick of time, Greg.
GREG Well, where do you want me to put it?
MARSHA Oh, put it anywhere.
FELICITY (interrupting GREG as he starts to put down the package) Greg, would you mind popping in a cartridge for us, if it’s no bother.
GREG No, it’s no bother. (mimes taking out a cartridge and putting it in as the others look on)
FELICITY Thanks Greg.
MARSHA Thank you, Greg!
GREG No problem, ladies. It’s just another thing Brown can do for you.
(All three exit the scene, pulling out cell phones.
GREG goes downstage right.
MARSHA goes downstage left.
FELICITY goes downstage center.)
FELICITY Sarah? You know that bitch of a temp, Marsha? Well you’ll never believe what just happened!
SCENE 2
LIGHTS & SOUND Signal transition back in time.
(Same scene as before, but from FELICTY’S point of view. MARSHA is catty and backbiting, full of sarcasm. GREG is useless and pathetic.)
MARSHA (enters room as before but with more attitude, more anger) It’s not working! (messes with copier)
FELICITY (enters, cattily) Hello, Marsha.
MARSHA (sneering) Hello, Ms. Walker.
FELICITY (sneering back) Please, call me Felicity. Problems?
MARSHA I can’t seem to get this copier to work. It seems broken.
FELICITY Let me see if I can make it work.
MARSHA Thanks. I’ve never been good with machines. They kind of scare me.
FELICITY You just have to show them who’s boss. Ah, here’s your problem. You’re out of toner.
MARSHA Toner?
FELICITY The ink. It’s out. (starts to look around) Well, help me find some. There should be some around here somewhere.
MARSHA What am I looking for?
FELICITY A box marked “toner.” There should be some around her somewhere. (searches for a bit) And it’s not that scary.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY Machines aren’t that scary. They are predictable. It’s people who are scary. Especially people like that guy who traveled all over the world with an untreatable case of tuberculosis. That’s scary.
MARSHA Yeah, I suppose so.
GREG (enters and coughs to alert the two to his presence) Excuse me, ladies. I’ve got a UPS delivery here.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY What do you have for us… (looks at nametag) Greg?
GREG (looks at box) Errr… toner.
MARSHA (sarcastically) My hero!
FELICITY That’s exactly what we need. You showed up in the nick of time, Greg.
GREG Well, where do you want me to put it?
MARSHA (dismissive) Oh, put it anywhere.
FELICITY (interrupting GREG as he starts to put down the package) Greg, would you mind popping in a cartridge for us, if it’s no bother.
GREG (frightened) No, it’s no bother. (mimes taking out a cartridge and putting it in as the others look on)
FELICITY Thanks Greg.
MARSHA Thank you, Greg!
GREG (scared) No problem, ladies. It’s just another thing Brown can do for you.
(All three exit the scene, pulling out cell phones.
GREG goes downstage right.
MARSHA goes downstage left.
FELICITY goes downstage center.)
MARSHA Mom? You know that really scary supervisor that I told you about, Ms. Walker? Well you’ll never believe what just happened!
SCENE 3
LIGHTS & SOUND Signal transition back in time.
(Same scene as before, but from MARSHA’S point of view - scary and full of suspense. FELICTY is spooky and threatening. GREG is seen as a rescuer.)
MARSHA (enters room timidly, papers in hand, starts to use copier) It’s not working! (messes with copier)
FELICITY (enters) Hello, Marsha.
MARSHA (jumps) Hello, Ms. Walker.
FELICITY (enticingly) Please, call me Felicity. Problems?
MARSHA (stuttering, scared) I can’t seem to get this copier to work. It seems broken.
FELICITY Let me see if I can make it work.
MARSHA Thanks. I’ve never been good with machines. They kind of scare me.
FELICITY You just have to show them who’s boss. Ah, here’s your problem. You’re out of toner.
MARSHA Toner?
FELICITY The ink. It’s out. (starts to look around) Well, help me find some. There should be some around here somewhere.
MARSHA What am I looking for?
FELICITY A box marked “toner.” There should be some around her somewhere. (searches for a bit) And it’s not that scary.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY Machines aren’t that scary. They are predictable. It’s people who are scary. Especially people like that guy who traveled all over the world with an untreatable case of tuberculosis. That’s scary.
MARSHA (really frightened) Yeah, I suppose so.
GREG (enters and coughs to alert the two to his presence, frightening MARSHA) Excuse me, ladies. I’ve got a UPS delivery here.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY What do you have for us… (looks at nametag) Greg?
GREG (looks at box) Errr… toner.
MARSHA My hero!
FELICITY That’s exactly what we need. You showed up in the nick of time, Greg.
GREG Well, where do you want me to put it?
MARSHA (relieved) Oh, put it anywhere.
FELICITY (interrupting GREG as he starts to put down the package) Greg, would you mind popping in a cartridge for us, if it’s no bother.
GREG No, it’s no bother. (mimes taking out a cartridge and putting it in as the others look on)
FELICITY Thanks Greg.
MARSHA Thank you, Greg!
GREG No problem, ladies. It’s just another thing Brown can do for you.
(All three exit the scene, pulling out cell phones.
GREG goes downstage right.
MARSHA goes downstage left.
FELICITY goes downstage center.)
GREG Hey Chuck! You know those really hot office workers who are always giving me the eye at 222 East Third? Well you’ll never believe what just happened!
SCENE 4
LIGHTS & SOUND Signal transition back in time.
(Same scene as before, but from GREG’S point of view – full of lust and double entendre and innuendo. Ham it up!)
MARSHA (enters room, papers in hand, starts to use copier) It’s not working! (messes with copier)
FELICITY (enters, seductively) Hello, Marsha.
MARSHA (smiling) Hello, Ms. Walker.
FELICITY Please, call me Felicity. Problems?
MARSHA I can’t seem to get this copier to work. It seems broken.
FELICITY Let me see if I can make it work.
MARSHA Thanks. I’ve never been good with machines. They kind of scare me.
FELICITY You just have to show them who’s boss. Ah, here’s your problem. You’re out of toner.
MARSHA Toner?
FELICITY The ink. It’s out. (starts to look around) Well, help me find some. There should be some around here somewhere.
MARSHA What am I looking for?
FELICITY A box marked “toner.” There should be some around her somewhere. (searches for a bit) And it’s not that scary.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY Machines aren’t that scary. They are predictable. It’s people who are scary. Especially people like that guy who traveled all over the world with an untreatable case of tuberculosis. That’s scary.
MARSHA Yeah, I suppose so.
GREG (enters and coughs to alert the two to his presence) Excuse me, ladies. I’ve got a UPS delivery here.
MARSHA What?
FELICITY What do you have for us… (looks at nametag) Greg?
GREG Errr… toner.
MARSHA My hero!
FELICITY That’s exactly what we need. You showed up in the nick of time, Greg.
GREG Well, where do you want me to put it?
MARSHA Oh, put it anywhere.
FELICITY (interrupting GREG as he starts to put down the package) Greg, would you mind popping in a cartridge for us, if it’s no bother.
GREG No, it’s no bother. (mimes taking out a cartridge and putting it in as the others look on with lust and passion)
FELICITY Thanks Greg.
MARSHA Thank you, Greg!
GREG No problem, ladies. It’s just another thing Brown can do for you.
(All three exit the scene, pulling out cell phones.
GREG goes downstage right.
MARSHA goes downstage left.
FELICITY goes downstage center.)
ALL THREE You’ll never believe what just happened!
LIGHTS OUT
THE END
It's Out of the Hat time again, so I'm writing a short play for tomorrow night and for Saturday night based on prompts drawn (where else?) out of a hat.
This time around for the 8 short plays each night, 2 of the writers will share the same prompts so the audience can see what different directions the set of prompts can take the writers. These were the prompts for Lauren Fleischman and me...
Who: Bruce Wayne
What: heart-shaped tattoo with the name “Bubba” in it
Where: a house where there’s been a murder
It's going to be performed Friday night at Renegade Comedy Theater, but you can read it here first!
Home of the Brave
written for Out of the Hat 9
Renegade Comedy Theatre
Duluth, Minnesota
CAST:
DIANA – Diana Prince, formerly Wonder Woman
BRUCE – Bruce Wayne, formerly Batman
LIGHTS UP BRUCE is sitting at a computer, unkempt.
DIANA (from offstage) Bruce, I’m home! (enters) How… (takes in the place) was your… day?
BRUCE Oh, you're back. That was fast. (looks at watch) Wow, is it really that late?
DIANA Bruce, have you been sitting at the computer all day? (starts doing tidying up business)
BRUCE Well, sort of… but I’ve been keeping my wits sharp solving crimes…
DIANA Solving crimes?
BRUCE Well, yeah, testing my wits against other crime sleuths around the world.
DIANA (moves over to look at the screen) Lemme see…
BRUCE (blocking her view, talking fast) You see, there was this murder… in an old mansion…
DIANA Old mansion… uh huh…
BRUCE Yes, and… (succumbs to her cold stare)
DIANA (looks at the screen) So, the caped crusader figured out that Miss Scarlet did it in the kitchen with a lead pipe. (a take) Ewww!
BRUCE Well, actually, Clark got that one. But I’m still 3 out of 5 for today!
DIANA You’ve been playing Clue with Clark all day on-line?
BRUCE No! That would be silly… (laughs) You can’t play Clue with just two people. Dick has been playing as well. (types into the computer) Diana is home. They say “hi!” (reads and laughs and then types) OMG LOL U NERDZ.
DIANA What did they write?
BRUCE (covering the screen with his hand) Uh. Nothing…
DIANA (pries hand away) “LOL Oh, I guess it’s golden lasso time! LOL” (stares daggers at Bruce)
BRUCE Don’t look at me! It was Clark who wrote it.
DIANA It’s not that…
BRUCE (bewildered) Good, I mean… then… what is it?
DIANA Bruce, look at you. You’re a changed person!
BRUCE (checks self) What do you mean?
DIANA Ever since you were… laid off it’s like you don’t have any energy to do anything. You just stay at home, cooped up, staring at your computer.
BRUCE Laid off? Laid off?
DIANA (cringing) Well…
BRUCE Is that what you call it? They took a controlling share of Wayne Industries, they took away the batmobile, the batcopter, the batboat, the batcycle, the batcave, the batcomputer, and… (starts to break down)
DIANA Bruce…
BRUCE They took away my utility belt. (starts to sob)
DIANA (moves in to comfort BRUCE) Oh, sweetie…
BRUCE (pulls together) Ever since that… fucking Patriot Act…
DIANA I know, I know honey…
BRUCE It’s easy for you. They gave you your old job back at the DOD.
DIANA Easy? Hey, pal, don’t you think I miss my invisible jet? I used to jet around the world but now…
BRUCE (snarling) Now you work at the Pentagon at least…
DIANA Oh sure, I work at the Pentagon with a bunch of grabass desk jockeys and generals who call me “Sugar” and ask if I can get them some coffee.
BRUCE But, at least you get out of the house.
DIANA Bruce, you should think about getting out of the house too. I think you need to.
BRUCE But… Diana, you know I’m not allowed to do the whole… cape thing again.
DIANA No, I meant, get a job… a regular job.
BRUCE Doing what?
DIANA Well, the Starbucks down the street is hiring.
BRUCE (stares at DIANA) Sure, that’d be great. I could have an espresso machine utility belt. (as if he’s serving coffee from his belt) Here’s your Grande Latte… foooosh… with two shots of hazelnut… sa-punk, sa-punk… and whipped cream… whooooosh!
DIANA Well, Bruce, you’ve got to do something. You just can’t sit here.
BRUCE Why not? Why can’t I just sit here? They don’t want heroes anymore. They want me to sit this one out, so why don’t I?
DIANA Because it’s not like you…
BRUCE But this is the new Bruce Wayne. No more gadgets. No more costumes. No more soirees with the Paris Hiltons of the world. Why? Because it’s too dangerous to have “these loose cannons acting on their own.” Because they labeled us “terrorists” and took away our lives, that’s why.
DIANA That’s not…
BRUCE Don’t defend them! Don’t you dare defend them! (calms down a bit) You know what I really do, Diana, when you leave for work? Hmm? Want to know?
DIANA (still rattled a bit) Yes, Bruce. I want to know.
BRUCE I sit down and turn on CNN and I just laugh and laugh. Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Israel, Lebanon, North Korea… hell, New Orleans… I just sit there in my terry cloth bath robe and I… laugh.
DIANA No, you don’t.
BRUCE Sure I do. Because it’s not my problem anymore. I’ve been absolved. Relieved of duty! I’ve been told not to worry my pretty little head about it. They gave a rifle to some kid from Alabama named Bubba with a heart shaped tattoo and sent him overseas and it’s his job now. I’m free… to shop… to watch expanded cable… to play “Clue” with my buddies on-line. And I just laugh… and laugh… and laugh… (starts to tear up)
DIANA Bruce… get dressed… we’re going out.
BRUCE I’m not going to apply at Starbucks, Diana…
DIANA No, I know. I’ve got a better idea. We’re going spelunking.
BRUCE You mean… spelunking? In a cave spelunking?
DIANA Yeah, hot shot, I happen to know where there are some caves not too far away from here. What’s the matter? You chicken all of a sudden?
BRUCE Won’t… (looks around) “they” be a bit unhappy about us going… to a cave?
DIANA What’s the matter with a little innocent, harmless outing for… exercise and fresh air. It’s still a free country. Right?
BRUCE Where are these caves, anyway?
DIANA (smiles and types something into the computer) Google Earth… latitude… longitude… zoom in… There’s the entrance. (taps screen) Right there.
BRUCE But that would lead right under the Pentagon (dawn of recognition) where you’ve been working for the last five years.
DIANA (feigns surprise) Would it? Imagine that!
BRUCE Move over! (starts typing) Hey guys… up for a little outing with Diana and me?
THE END
About 14 years ago some friends and I wrote, produced, and performed a play called "The Reduced Bible - from Genesis to Revelation in 60 minutes or less or your money back." A few years ago I rewrote a few parts of it and made them into self standing one acts. This week I rewrote Paul Live, in which all of the Epistles of Paul are reimagined as a radio call-in show, and it was performed at the church I in which I grew up in Wapakoneta, Ohio. Here's the whole thing for anyone who wants to read it.
It can also be found on leiturgia.net.
If you want to perform this piece, I remind my gentle readers that everything on this site is under a Creative Commons license.
Cast in order of appearance
Lydia – Paul’s sidekick
Paul – apostle and radio show host
Luke - a writer
Phil – from Philippi
Gail – from Galatia
Earl – from Ephesus
Rhonda – from Rome
Carrie – from Colossus
Cory – from Corinth
Thelma – from Thessalonica
Timothy - a youth
Titus
Lydia – Good morning East Asia and all the ships at sea! It’s time for Paul Live. Heeeere’s Paul!
Paul – Good morning all! I’m your host, Paul the Apostle, and I’m here to answer your questions. I’m here with my good friend, Lydia of Thyatira. She and I met up one day by a river and I saved her from a life of wealth and influence. Isn’t that right, Lyd?
Lydia – Don’t even remind me! I can honestly say my life has never been the same. I gave up a job in the fashion industry to join your show. But I suppose I wouldn’t have it any other way… except for the coffee. Can’t we get better coffee?
Paul – (laughs) We’ll see what we can do about that. The phone banks are full, so let’s go to Luke on 1. What’s up Luke?
Lydia – Hi Luke!
Luke – Hi, I’m writing this history of the church and I was doing some research into your past. Weren’t you once called “Saul” and didn’t you use to persecute Christians? I have evidence that you were the coat check boy at the stoning of Stephen. Is this true?
Lydia – Oh, I’m sure you’ve got the wrong guy. The Paul I know would have never done something like that.
Paul – Well I hate to say it, but you’re right, Luke. It’s a chapter of my life I don’t much like to talk about, but that was all before I saw the light. Literally. I was heading to Damascus to wipe out the church there when I saw a blinding light.
Lydia – What happened?
Paul – I was blinded. What do you think happens when you see a blinding light? Anyway, I heard this voice saying, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” and I’ve never been the same since. Changed my name. Did a 180. Never looked back. And that’s the gospel truth. Good luck with that book, Luke. Sounds like you got a winner on your hands. Who’s our next caller?
Lydia - Phil from Philippi, you are on Paul Live.
Phil – Hey, Paul, long time listener, first time caller. I think I knew you too, way back when, in the Saul days. Weren’t you a big shot in your old life? Why did you turn your back on it?
Paul – Yeah, I was a good Jewish boy, circumcised on the eighth day, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Pharisee, zealous in my persecution of the church, and if you count legalistic righteousness, I was faultless.
Lydia – You were such a momma’s boy, weren’t you?
Paul – Maybe I was, but compared to knowing Christ, I count that all as so much…
Lydia – Whoa! You can’t say that word on the air, Paul!
Paul - Well, you know what I mean. But the point is I didn’t lose a thing, Phil. I gained everything. Who’s next?
Lydia - I’ve got Gail from Galatia on 3. Hi, Gail. What’s your question?
Gail – Hi, Paul! So Doris and I were talking the other day and she said that she heard a preacher say that you had to be circumcised to become a Christian, and I says to her, I says, “Not according to Paul.” Cause I listens to you all the time, Paul.
Paul – Thanks for listening, Gail. You stick to your guns. We have got to defeat this whole “circumcision party” nonsense. These flesh choppin’ preachers just burn me up. You know what I wish? I wish they would just cut themselves off entirely and be done with it, if you know what I mea…
Lydia – Paul!
Paul – Lyd, I’m sick and tired of these preachers who try to put up hurdles for people to jump to get to God. Christ came to tear barriers down, not put up new ones! Besides, Lyd, you of all people should understand the secret agenda here of the circumcision crowd. If you have to be circumcised to be a Christian who does that eliminate from the running?
Lydia – Well, people who can’t be circumcised.
Paul – And that would mean?
Lydia – Women!
Paul – You got that right. Think that’s by accident? I don’t think so. Who’s next?
Lydia – We got… Earl from Ephesus, you’re on.
Earl – Paul! Why do you spend your time going out to the Gentiles? Why have you abandoned your people? What’s your problem, pal?
Lydia – Hey, Earl, I’m a Gentile! You got a problem with that?
Earl – Maybe I do.
Paul – Earl, you better back off. I have not abandoned my people. Whenever I go on the speaking circuit the first place I go is to the local synagogue. I only go to the marketplace after they kick me out of the synagogue…
Lydia - So you can usually find him in the synagogue in the morning and the marketplace by noon. (laughs)
Paul – (laughing) True enough! Look Earl, Christ came to bridge the gap between God and all of humanity, not just the Jews. He came to bring peace for all, not just some. Christ is fulfilling the promise to Abraham that his descendents would be a blessing to all nations. So are we or not, Earl? Earl?
Lydia – I think he hung up, Paul.
Paul – (shakes head) Some people… Who’s next, Lyd?
Lydia - Hey, we’ve got a call from Rome. Rhonda from Rome, you’re on.
Rhonda – Hey, Paul! Great to finally get on! So, if God has raised Christ from the dead and rejected the Jews in favor of the Gentiles, can we trust this God? I mean, God seems pretty capricious!
Paul – Well, Rhonda, I take issue with the idea that God has rejected the Jews. Actually, just the opposite. I believe that the covenant that God made with my people is as strong as ever, but that God has brought the Gentiles, like Lydia here, into the fold, just as was intended from the beginning. Think of God’s love for the Jewish people like an olive tree and the Gentiles, well, they are like a branch that is grafted onto that tree.
Lydia – Nice metaphor, Paul. Got any more gardening tips? Let’s move on to Carrie from Colossus. What’s your question, Carrie?
Carrie – Hey, Paul, I’m a new Christian, or follower of Christ, or Jesus, or the Way, or whatever you call it, and I’m really really confused about what I’m allowed to eat and drink…
Lydia – (tries to interrupt Carrie as she builds, gently at first) Carrie…
Carrie – and what I’m supposed to do on what days
Lydia – Carrie…
Carrie – and there seems to be so many rules about things to do during certain cycles of the moon and…
Lydia – Carrie! Get a grip, girl!
Carrie – I’m so confused! I’m totally wigging out here! Tell me what to do!
Paul – Okay, Carrie, first thing I want you to do is to take a deep breath. Okay?
Carrie – (a little calmer) Okay.
Paul – Okay, I know there are some people out there that like to tell people the right way to live and observe holidays and diets and stuff like that. Carrie, I’m here to tell you that that stuff has nothing to do with being a Christian. Really. That’s all human rules and teachings. The important thing is that in your baptism you died with Christ and now you live for Christ. Keep that first, and everything else will fall into place.
Carrie – But what am I supposed to wear and…
Paul – No “buts” Carrie. Keep it simple. Who’s next, Lyd?
Lydia – Okay, let’s go to Cory in Corinth. You’re on the air, Cory.
Cory – Hey, piggybacking on Carrie’s question, sorta, I got into this argument the other day with someone in my church about the local butchers here in Corinth. See, all the butchers here work through the pagan temples so all the meat they serve has been dedicated to idols in its preparation. So he said we should boycott the meat and become vegetarians. But I said that since Jesus was above any petty deity that it was okay to eat the meat. So which is it?
Paul – Great question. Okay, Cory, I agree with you up to a point. We know there is the one God, and so the meat… it’s just meat.
Lydia – So it’s okay to eat it, right?
Paul – You’d think that, but here’s the tricky part. I know it’s just meat, and you know it’s just meat, and Cory knows it’s just meat, but what about other people?
Lydia – What about ‘em?
Paul - See, people are superstitious about these things. If they see us eating the meat they might think we were condoning worship of these false gods, and even though that wasn’t the intent, that would be the effect. So, even though you are strong in faith, Cory, and I agree with you, don’t eat the meat.
Lydia – Huh, never thought about it like that. We’ve got another call from Thelma from Thessalonica.
Thelma – So, Paul, Patty and I were wondering when we should expect Jesus to return. I was thinking next Thursday afternoon, sometime between 3:13 and 4:42. Whaddyasay, Paul?
Paul – (laughs) No one knows, Thelma. And the point isn’t to be guessing. Christ comes like a thief in the night. The point is to live a good life – a life that would be pleasing to God. Stick to that Thelma, and then you don’t have to worry about God’s timetable, you’ll always be ready.
Lydia – Hey, Paul! It’s our old pal Titus, on line 2!
Paul - Titus, how are you? Last time I saw you was in Crete!
Titus – Hey, Paul, yeah, still in Crete, and that’s part of the problem. There are these preachers going around saying that Cretans are fat, lazy, good for nothing liars and cheats. That’s sort of negatively impacting my ministry here, Paul. Help!
Paul – Yeah, well, those are rumors being spread by my old pals from the circumcision crowd again. Snip, snip!
Lydia – (with warning in her voice) Paul…
Paul - The problem with those people is that they start out negative so their whole message is negative. They themselves are corrupted so they see everything as corrupted. You tell the folks in Crete that they don’t speak for the whole church. They certainly don’t speak for me. Hope things get better, Titus.
Lydia - Hey, it’s old home week! We’ve got Timothy on 1. Heya, Timmy!
Timothy – (squeaky adolescent voice) Hi, Lydia! Hi, Paul! I’ve been having some problems in my own ministry because people tell me I’m too young.
Paul – Tim, don’t let anyone put you down because of your age. Set an example in the way you live, love others, and your faith. You were called to preach, so preach! Don’t doubt God’s calling. Hang in there, Tim.
Well, that’s about all the time we have for Paul Live today. One last thing. Philemon, if you’re listening, Onesimus is safe with me here and I’ve got him working in the control room. Now, I know he’s your slave and he took off without your leave, and he’s heading back your way. And I know that you will treat him very well. Everyone who’s listening knows you will treat him very well, right? Okay? Nuff said.
Okay, that’s it for today. Keep the faith, everyone.
Lydia – Bye!
