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Keeping it Surreal in Duluth

MrNice_300px.jpgMr. Nice is running for mayor of Duluth, Minnesota. At least, he wants to. City officials are denying him access to the ballot because they say he's not a person, he's a piece of art. As if we've never elected a puppet to office! At least with Mr. Nice we know what we're getting!

Here is his announcement of candidacy courtesy of Starfire.

His platform includes:

  • Open the Duluth tunnel system for strolling
  • Refinance the health care crisis by defaulting on the loan
  • Turn the Aquarium into a revenue-generating sport-fishing arena and Navy SEAL training facility
  • A secret plan for both ending and continuing the war in Iraq
  • Legalize gangsterism in order to fund more police to keep our communities safer
  • Sell fighter jet parts from the air base to Iran to offset the retiree healthcare crisis

His struggle is the subject of this Duluth News Tribune article and there is a poll on the main page asking "Would you vote for a puppet?" Feel free to flood the poll.

There is a rally protesting his exclusion from the ballot today at 4:20pm on the commons outside the Duluth City Hall.

Comments

well, im sure there are folks out there who would vote for mr. nice.

about the iran, plane parts for oil program?

rumsfeld and haliberton have already sealed that deal.
except, it's going to pad their own personal life extension research budget

who needs health health care when you can live forever?
oh thats right.. those that cant afford the cure to their engineered avian flu virus...
welcome to the project for a new american century!
ALL HAIL EMPEROR CHENEY!

oh nevermind...

I would so vote for Mr. Nice if I lived in Duluth. Who doesn't want legalized gangsterism?

I'm for sport fishing arenas. They should be everywhere. Brett never gets to go fishing anymore, and we sure can't afford to shell out for real deep sea or Great Lakes fishing trips. He's got my vote

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